The Eternal Silence of Space and Nothingness
by justinxx
Summary: Kal-El reflects on all that has happened from the battle of Metropolis and wonders if he can be the hero he wants to be. POV of Kal-El. Based on Man of Steel Superman. To the people who believe Kal-El felt no remorse for the ones who died in the fight against General Zod's forces.


The gravity of the planet Earth grants me the ability to manipulate its force as it is younger than my home planet's gravitational pull. I am able to fly above the clouds and out of Earth's atmosphere and past the hundreds of stars, asteroids, and planets beyond. I have accelerated hearing, laser beams that can blast out of my eyes at will, I can freeze anything with my breath, and I am stronger than any being on this planet. Even with all these abilities, I was not strong enough to defend Earth from General Zod's assault.

The freedom of flight helps clear my mind of all the restrictions and cruelty of the world below me from time to time, but it is difficult not to dwell on all that has happened when it is what plagues my nightmares each night. Lois can only help so much. As much as I admire her care, tenderness, and belief in my efforts, these thoughts are always in the back of my mind. I wish it were easier for the human race to understand my intentions, I really do.

Since the battle of Metropolis, I have been perceived as many things. I have been told that I have no right being on this planet for I am not a natural-born citizen. I have been told that no matter how much I rebuild the broken streets, build up the crumbled buildings, and fix the destruction and devastation that has been caused, that it will never make up for the tragedy of the thousands of citizens and loved ones that died in the fight between Zod's forces. I am seen as an alien who did nothing but cause mayhem and destruction, despite how hard I had fought to stop Zod's army from rebuilding Krypton over the planet Earth with the World Engine.

I have come to truly care for this planet so much over the 33 years of my existence, and it genuinely saddens me that I have let them down.

My Kryptonian father claimed I was born to become a beacon of hope to the Earth's people. He swore that I would forever change the world and that my abilities would help the planet strive to become better. Was he wrong in that assumption? Have I become a symbol of despair and loss? Am I meant to change the world in a negative way?

Not a day goes by that I don't cry and scream for all the people that had died that day. The eternal silence of space and nothingness cannot contain my cries of sorrow. Beautiful people had perished at Zod and I's hands. It pains me immensely that I am the reason life has become so much harder for these people. Billions of dollars are being used to rebuild the city to its former greatness and I can only do so much before a mob strikes out. Families and friends cry themselves to sleep each night and I hear every curse and prayer. I have felt every person's death in my soul and it is becoming too much to hold as I let myself escape into these dark thoughts. Just as Zod mourned the extinction of the Kryptonian race the day of his release from the Phantom Zone, unable to guard them from Krypton's unstoppable demise, I mourn the demise of the people that I sworn to protect as well.

I know that I can't save everybody. I wish that certainty did not exist. I tried to save as many as I could through the painful, tiring fights between Faora and Zod and destroying the World Engines before the city caved in on itself, but it was just not enough. No one deserved to die that day. The last citizens of Krypton were here because of me and there is no one to blame but myself for that. If anyone deserved death that day, it should have been me. But now that Metropolis is slowly building itself back up and Zod and his forces are dealt with, I am the only living being to blame for what has happened, which leads to the division of society's views on my actions.

My earthly parents told me that when it was time to show the world what I was capable of doing, they would react in two different ways. They could see me as someone to inspire goodness and hope to. I could be trusted to protect the lives of the human race and to help it achieve greatness. I could leave a positive impact on the world and achieve great feats in my lifetime.

But there was also the other side of the coin to my reveal. I might strike fear into its people because of my abilities and become a threat to the human race. The government might pressure me into being a weapon to end all wars or to create new ones. Society could realize that I cannot truly be contained and may take drastic measures to get rid of me. I might continue to cause chaos and destruction to the places and lives of those around me, even if I convince myself that I am doing it all for the sake of the people I swore to protect.

I understand that they are afraid of me. I understand why they are hesitant about allowing me to protect them when I unknowingly brought an alien war general and his allies to their world and I realize the full consequences of my actions and am ready to face their questions and show them that I am a force of good.

But how can all the pain I've caused become a symbol of hope to the world? Is this the first step to becoming a hero that the world needs? What do I have to do to make them realize that I am still figuring out who I am and the extent of my abilities? How can I make my people see that I am just misunderstood and am willing to go to any lengths necessary to ensure their safety from any and all wrong-doers? Will I ever be the hero that I need to be? Can I ever be trusted to watch over the citizens of Metropolis, to be treated as a human being?

As I am slowly trailing along the Earth's orbit through the darkness of space, overlooking the planet from which I was raised, I break out of thought as the sun begins to rise over the city of Metropolis. The emergence of bright light beams over the planet and a ray of energy illuminates the coat of arms on my chest, the symbol of my family, the House of El, which resembles hope. Gazing lovingly at the calm blue shades of the oceans and the oddly shaped land masses through unique swirls of snow colored clouds, I realize once again how beautiful this planet truly is. Although it can be an unforgiving and harsh place to live on at times, there is still so much beauty, complexity, and magnificence to be explored and discovered.

I peer down at the symbol embroidered on my chest and feel a rush of determination fill my body. Hope and understanding follow after. I now must face the obstacles that are in my path and overcome them. I understand the fear and speculation that my arrival has brought up and I am ready to conquer it head-on. I hope that someone will understand my intentions as I hold on to the possibility of being trusted as a motivation to move forward.

The sun has risen over Metropolis, and as I shoot through the atmosphere like a speeding bullet and admire the beauty of life, I cling to the belief that I can be the good person that Lois and both my Earth and Kryptonian parents saw I can be. I believe that I can become a protector of Earth, to be what I was born to be.

To be a Superman.


End file.
